The glow swallows your dorm, flooding your body with raw cosmic energy until you're practically humming with it. The tracksuit army drops to their knees-you're their leader now-but divine power can't erase your tuition bill or stop your RA from knocking about noise complaints. You live the rest of your life glowing faintly like a radioactive highlighter, worshipped as a god but still broke and cramming essays at 3 a.m. Would you like to draw another card?